We Eat Bully's for Breakfast !!!!!

Isaiah enjoying his well earned meal :)

Do you ever feel like you are sending your kids to the lions den when dropping them off at school?  Well I do! Who will make fun of him? Will they give him a hard time cause he isn't the smartest or the most athletic? Will they make fun of him because his clothes or back pack? Will he blend in or be a peg that sticks out for kids to target? Well these are all the questions I ask myself as I send my kid up the campus from the safety of mommy's "I love you, you love me " car to his pompous charter school located on a beautifully overpriced campus in the most expensive part of town I could get him into. Don't get me wrong it's a great school with amazing teachers, in the right part of town, awesome parent involvement, but still the same snide kids lurk around the corner to push or keep down kids that don't make there idea of the mold of a kid should be.


Bullying is so hard to deal with as a mom. I know I am not the one being pushed down at the play ground or being made fun of in the class, but I get to deal with all the emotional scars that are left on my son's heart. When I was younger I never had a problem with bully's. I didn't even realize I wasn't cool till I was in fourth grade, but by then I already had a circle of friends. I was happy to be who I was and have a lil posse to call my own. Occasionally, I would get picked on but nothing that made me want to change schools or feel alienated from the entire class. RARELY did I come home crying. I was always well liked and had a best friend and was never afraid to go to school. So I have a hard time relating to kids that are picked on constantly because I was never that targeted kid. School can not only be a education of academic, but a lot of social education and discovery goes on at these tender elementary years. I always am worried that the trauma of the social aspects of school and the heart ache of bullying may not be worth the gain in knowledge in academics for my child.





So how do I say this with out selling out my kiddo -- I can't. He is a bit on the funky side! Honestly that is why we love him. He thinks creatively, he goes from A to B to W and back to C. He goes to his own beat and will never fit any mold. He is unique and born to stand out. He is such a sweet kid but not always relate-able to his peers. We as a family have definitely struggled with Isaiah being bullied for some time now. With all my might I want to jump up and attack that kid or the parent and go all ninja on them, but I find that the more I stand up for my kid the less he stands up for himself. Its a fine line of trying to be protective and teaching confidence. I want to be the momma bear. I really struggle with staying in the back round while he is at the bat with someone pitching who is way out of his league.


So the other day my son came home really upset about how a friend was treating him. On top of that he scored low on a test because he was rushing through it. He said it was because he didn't want to get made fun of cause he was the last to finish.... all in all the worst day a third grader could have. I did the typical mom thing. I gave him a pep talk about his so called lil punk friends. Then I also gave him a lesson about confidence and how it doesn't matter what other ppl think. Like no matter how dumb they say you are it doesn't make them smarter -- that speech.


After he cried and we got all settled I decided to send him off to play while I fixed dinner. If any of you know me you know we are dealing with deployment and I am on Jenny Craig so lately dinner has been tuna, cereal, or oven pizza for Zay (poor guy). I wanted to make him some thing special because of the tragedies that day had brought him. I made him his favorite... Breakfast for Dinner! But I made it extra special cause I made it with a creative twist. I arranged it so it looked like an angry kids face. I told him I made him his Big Bully Breakfast!!!! The lights is his eyes gleamed at the funny guys face and the way his cheeks were ear to ear even though they were still stained with the tears from not too long ago was heart warming.  And the fact that it was his favorite food was just the syrup on his pancakes. He was so happy & excited to crush the bully. Not only did he eat his favorite meal but I remind him that HE can be in control of the bully situation.


Being a parent you never quite know when to step in or when to empower your kid to handle the situation and let them step up by themselves. That day I felt that I was doing everything I needed to in order to make MySaiah feel special and like he could handle the challenges his life throws at him. That is really all I want as a mother -- I want my kid to feel good about himself and confident that he can overcome that life puts in front of him. So in my book it was success-- I didn't call the school board, I didn't beat up a 9 year old punk, my child is not going to be home schooled.  We sat there together eating our bully and laughed and talked and enjoyed the night -- even if we were crazy outcast together we were so happy. It isn't easy being a parent, but I also know it isn't easy being a kid either! I think we both stepped up and met our issues for the day head on. I could not have been prouder <3 

Party Perfection.....

I Scream 

You Scream 

Isaiah is serving.... 

ICE CREAM !!!

Well I have on beloved son, Isaiah. And though he is the jewel of my eye he is still a kid and has ups and downs. This year has been a very difficult year for him and has been a lot of downs. He has had a hard time adjusting to a new school and with his daddy leaving underway. Usually we have a huge party with all the trimmings and everyone in the world invited. This year I was going to skip the party cause of all our difficulties we have had. My husband and I felt he had not earned a celebration.  Well that was not an option to Grandma!   She was going to come out his birthday weekend whether we liked it our not.

So last minute I threw together the idea of and Ice Cream Parlor Party ! I thought I would save on food and just make a table with sprinkles and toppings. Buy some ice creams and cones and call it a party with a Facebook invite and all.  Well after I bought all of the toppings I realized food would have been the same price lol. As well I decided I would make all the decorations to save money. I have tons of crafty stuff and it would be cheaper then buying them ! (What I forgot is all the effort I put into it ) I also decided to make his cup cakes cause I wanted to make them cutesie ice cream cone cupcakes ! Don't worry I will post explanation of all my projects below. 

Well when it was all said and done I ended up spending less and making more and it was fabulous. As Isaiah's decorations went up each day he got so super excited about his party. The day of his party it was my family and some of my Navy family. We were putting some of the finishing touches on his party and I noticed Zay had a birthday message from his dad! It was daddy singing happy birthday from across the world. Of course everyone was in tears and Zay was touched but also very sad his dad couldn't spend the day with him. The tears were interrupted by a door bell ring and it was like end of the crying round on to the party round. MyZaiah jumped into party mode and the friends started arriving. 

So, way before the party Rick called and asked if he should order a gift online or if he should just let me pick it out and save on shipping and get more stuff. Well we opted for the more stuff. But my friends and I had a blast wrapping it up to look like a package-- dirtying it, adding fake tags and post marks, sitting on the box -- it really looked genuine as if it were shipped from across the world. It was the highlight of the party to know that even though dad wasn't there he sang with him and sent him a gift! 

All in all the party that i never wanted to have was awesome. My lil guy was happy not only cause he got to celebrate with his favorite people but also that his dad was apart of it too! That was the cherry on top of his sundae for him!  

Crafts:

First the Cupcake Cones ! 

Genius right ! I got the idea online and it was actually really easy to follow the instructions... I baked them myself.  Then I just topped them with a regular skewer that you can get for 99 cents for a bag of 100 at any market. Lastly, I topped the skewer  with a cut out I printed with his name and age and  matted it with matching card stock. 

Instructional video on the Cone Cupcakes :)

The Cake Box Stand 

I got FREE flat rate boxes at my local post office. Then I bought spray paint at Walmart that coordinated. It took a couple of coats but it worked. Then I brought on the power tools and used the hold makers (I know there is definitely a guy way of saying this attachment) to the drill and spaced them evenly. You should practice first so you get the size right and you don't ruin your pretty painted box. Afer I stacked them with the hot glue gun. I proceeded to decorate the boxes with scrappy left overs and his name. Super duper cute and way cheap! 

The Ice Cream Banners & Frame

The one with his name and the one holding the decorative cones on my entertainment center were all simply cut out from my Cricut with patience and color coordination I got a perfectly unique personalized banner for his party. I love the trick I learned to hang up the individual letters on ribbon with clothes pins. Its reusable and I can move it around till I find the center. 

The Canopy !

I wanted it to look like a real Ice Cream Shop so with 2 yards of fabric from Joannes and a PVC pipe I got the look I was going for. To prep I drilled holes at the end of the PVC pipe. Then I hot glued the fabric to the PVC pipe. Next I took a staple gun and attacked my ceiling with staples -- If you use the ceiling instead of the wall you get less of a gap in the fabric and the wall. After I used the holes to add a rope to the pipe. I attached the rope to the ceiling with more staples . to finish the edge I added a banner I made with my circut so you didn't see the pipe. I was amazing!!!!!!

 

Christian in Disguise....

I was raised in a Christan home by a very faithful devote mother. I went to private Christian school my whole life. I accepted Christ in my heart at the age of 5.  I even went to Biola University and considered studied Christian Education..... So when your friend says she doesn't consider you a spiritual or Christan friend it hurts. Not the words, but the reality. Am I not projecting the christian life style? Am I making Christianity look negative with me claiming to be one? What am I doing to not exemplify a good Christan woman. 


I have always been kind of quiet about my faith cause I wanted people to see Christ through my love and my kindness. I never wanted to be a bible thumper shoving Christianity down peoples throats and telling everyone they are going to hell. (I know that is an extreme opposite and most people aren't like that  :) But I guess showing Gods love and my love for Jesus through actions is not working cause my friends don't even think of me as "Christan"... I hoped that others would look at my life and my open mindedness to love and friendship and ask me what was different or why I was the way I am. That way they ushered in the conversation and I would just be answering there questions with my evangelism. 


NOW the truth. I should be wearing a shirt saying "God Squad"!!!! Not for the reminder to others whom I serve but I need to do it to remind me so I can know that I am ALWAYS an ambassador for Christ. To know that every curse word, every gossip, every road rage comes from me but ultimately exemplifies God in my life. That when I put a drink to my lips or a crude word comes from me it would be more diffucult to deny that what I do is a reflection of God in my life. The actions I do when I think it doesn't matter and to people that I may never see again or even to people I dislike is a missed opportunity for God to use me as a vessel for Him. Every time my friends come to me for advice about anything about a marriage or deployment or parenting I give my advice instead of praying with them and looking to God for counsel and asking Him to speak for me. I need a freaking shirt or tattoo to remind me what I have to offer in life is all given to me by the Grace of God... I should not be quiet I should be proud of the Christian I am and I should be a better one. The second I get comfortable I allow Satan to let me get lazy. I NEED A SHIRT!!!!  It will hold me to a higher authority and accountability that everyone knows who I serve cause it is written on my chest instead of the heart that only God can visualize. I told everyone about my weight loss why haven't I decided to have and accountability partner when it comes to my after life and my heavenly future and my spiritual well being?! I am so ashamed. I need to make a change!


Christian in disguise no more -- I am Stephanie Medina-Perez a proud Christian woman and I need your support to help remind me that everything I do including my actions and my words and EVEN my FaceBook posts are a direct reflection of who is Lord in my life. My life is a story that everyone should be able to read and find Christ in it! I am not done growing Father forgive me for my reluctance to proclaim you in my life to others and forgive me for not serving you in a way you deserve.  My shirt is on Lord Jesus!

My disguise is off.... I hope to show the true Christ who lives in me !!!!

How Sweet it is .....to be loved by Him

Today me and my son had a date day ! I was feeling like a bad mommy cause for his spring break he was with the sitter most of the time because I was consumed with volunteer work and job hunting. So I called off volunteer stuff for some much needed mom and Zay time. 


Our date consisted of a trip to the mall. There we at lunch (pizza for him Jenny Craig food for me) and chatted about important things going on in the world like Bakugaun, Bionicles,  and Halo Reach. As well we talked about friendship and the importance of making good friends. After I treated him to lunch he and I went to a movie we saw Dairy of a Wimpy Kid 2 ... We had just finished the book so it made sense to go see it. While we entered the theater Isaiah brought his own change and insisted on treating me to some much needed video games and claw prize games. After his failures on winning me a prize we went and bought everything at the snack stand and enjoyed our movie. It was so funny we literally were laughing out loud by ourselves. My heart melted when he covered his eyes at the love parts and during the sentimental family parts he held my hand tight and squeezed it ! After that we went shopping for some stuff mommy needed in the mall. I had to exchange something at the MAC Store and my balance was 38 cents and here came Isaiah again to the rescue with his pockets full of change. After that we headed to Crazy 8 and I stood there forever while Zay watched TV and made friends with the boy in there. They laughed and thumbed through a video game magazine while i pretended to shop.  After all that we headed to Borders to buy the new Wimpy Kid book for our collection and of course a couple of other things he needed to live like a Lego man and another silly book for school and something to send daddy in his package-- don't worry mom got out with a few cute things too. 


Over all it was the best date I have been on in a while! It may have killed my budget but it was priceless to spend quality time with my baby boy and make him feel special ! I love days with silly laughter, accidental farts, and random hugs for mySaiah. He is too sweet for words. I am a lucky Mom! How sweet it is to be loved by mySaiah! 

Isaiah and I being Silly in the Car 

Chik-Fil-Aed..................

Sometimes I feel like I am the momma hen and some of my friends are the little chicks. I know that is maybe a little arrogant to say but its just how I feel. With every season of change in my life and in the life of the Military Spouse also come the huge turn over of friends. Either they moved or went back home or they are no longer at you command and you fell like you are bugging them when there husbands are home! The reasons keep on coming ! I was ready for the moving and even for the Jello schedule that my husband has but I wasn't ready for the changing relationships. Shut the front door it's hard.

So like I was saying I am the momma hen..... Well I find that I rally events at my house and I host a lot and I help everyone in crisis but when I have a mini emergency I am all alone. It is irritating. I have consistently been the one who is there for my friends but some times I feel like I am surrounded by people and yet all alone. And another thing, I am here joining people together and I get jealous when they hang out with out me. I know right! How the heck do they think they can be friends -- I like invented them together and I am the one sitting at home alone. What is wrong with this picture. Oh well I am just having a bad friend day. I miss being apart of mature women who are all momma hens and we can switch back and forth the roles and I can just be a regular chick. I miss my old deployment friends. They were all older and had kids my age and were way supportive and were there for me when I needed them most. It hard to not compare the groups of people. Both have ups and both have downs. 

So I guess I am just saying I need to get out of the hen house. Its making me mad! I should count my blessing instead of crying over my mishaps. Its hard sometimes to see the light in the darkness but I will continue to search. Until then I will stay out of the chicken coupe and just focus on my little chick in my hen house Isaiah and what works best for us !

Missing His Best Friend

We are the Perez Three: Rick, Stephanie, and Isaiah. Right now our family is minus one dad. His efforts and dedication right now are used aboard the USS Boxer where he proudly serves his country. This for us is deployment number three and as we continue on you think it would get easier with each time he leaves. You are wrong it doesn't.


With every developmental age my son goes through is a list of whole different ways that he deal with the separation from his father. Right now my Zay is struggling since he changed schools. He is not one for change and this school transition with the deployment of his dad was a lot of emotion for one little person. Just the other night we were talking about friends and how he can make improvements with the relationships he has at school. Amidst our lil conversation, I stopped him and told him no matter what he would always have friends at home and we loved him and will always support him. My child startled me when he interjected to add, "You and dad our my best friends and I dont need anyone else but I do need my dad. He is my favorite friend." Oh and out came the tears. We just held each other and cried and talked about all the fun stuff him and dad used to do and how they are going to do more great stuff once they are back together. It was so hard to hear the pain in my sons voice. I wish I could make it go away for him. I feel so guilty cause I did agree to this military life for me and Rick but no where in the equation did Isaiah have a say and he has to put up with the same issues we do. I wish I could make it easier. It is so hard to find ways to tell my 9 year old that his dad wont be home until maybe Christmas?! And that is not even for sure yet. I know that there are ups and downs to being a military brat but right now the down is seeing my baby hurting. With each passing day I remind him he loves him and he is coming home.

With that stated its hard for me to sell it to my kiddo and be strong for him when I am hurting to. I miss my best friend. Although I am surrounded by great friends  and family I would trade all of them for just him. I love my girlfriends our little group we call the "Fun Ready Girls" but I miss my husband. I think the loneliest times on deployment for me is when I have to be a parent alone. I feel solely responsible for how my kid is turning out and if there is any draw backs I feel they are a direct reflection on me cause I am a lot of the time the only parent. Its so dang hard. I wish there was a class for that done by the Navy a "how to be a single parent when married" I guess nothing can prepare you for this lifestyle. I will never be used to the empty bed, the unused clothes in the closet, the tools in the garage collecting dust and most of all my sons heart forever waiting for the days to go by quicker so he can be reunited with his best friend again.

Rick and Isaiah on the Family Day Cruise 2011

Waking up to Surprises

Today is the day ! So I am starting a blog and I am not much of a writer or a blogger but I wanted a space where I could come in and journal my thoughts for the day. A place to reflect on the stuff that went on and the stuff that makes our life unique.


Well this was not the day of epic feats or amazing events. It was the most uneventful day. I was such a bad mom this morning. I woke up with the worst headache in the world. I often get migraines with my PMS and today that coupled with feeling under the weather the past few days equaled disaster. I woke up on time... enough to go to the bathroom and wake my lil guy up and help him get ready for school. What I discovered was that he doesn't need me to get ready anymore. What the heck right my 9 year old boy is sufficient enough to take a bath, pick out clothes (even though I made him change into something that matches:) and make cereal all by himself. He was happy sitting on the floor eating cereal with everything ready for his day except his mom ! I felt kind of bad that I was lagging but kind of proud at the same time. My little man is growing up and is such a wonderful boy that I have taught to take care of himself. And though although I was just being crabby and tired I was way impressed that my little guy is able to handle himself and know what to do to and be responsible. He even brushed his teeth!


So my head pounding ache that made me want a brain transplant was also the key to see that my baby boy is rowing up and I am so proud of him. He is not the same baby I used to hold helpless and unable to feed himself he is a young boy that can take care of himself and even take care of his mommy too when she needs a little shove outta the bed. I love my little guy and today I saw him for the little man he is growing up to be. When did the years go ....